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Marianne's BLOG
Marianne Bryant
There are six of us in our family, and Caity our youngest child has autism. She has one older brother, Charlie, and two older sisters, Holly, and Cara, as well as her Dad and I. We also have a new addition to the family, Gibbs our puppy, (and yes, he was named for “Gibbs” on the TV show, NCIS).
I would like to write about some of our current experiences with autism as well as going down memory lane with others. These are tales of how we dealt with autism, sometimes with much laughter, as well as tears, and in many cases, tears of joy. I would like to share our experiences, so that you will have a better idea of our family’s perspective on autism, as well as life through Caity’s eyes. Caity is now fourteen, so we have been dealing with autism for quite awhile now and I have many tales to tell.
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Caity meets Facebook
Marianne Bryant
Caity has had a Facebook page for at least 3 years now and before that she had a "My Space". At first I was deathly afraid of the idea. I had visions of her sneaking out of the house to meet a "friend" in the middle of the night at the corner. She wasn't allowed to get . . .
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Caity Meets Her "Health Folder"
Marianne Bryant
Well this is a topic that no mom really wants to approach. Yet as all moms of daughters know, we eventually must approach the subject and with much apprehension. I had taken Caity to her pediatrician and was told that sometime within the next two years, the big event of her period would occur. I was in a major panic since I had not even thought of her being anywhere remotely close to this event. It seemed like just yesterda . . .
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Caity Meets Softened Butter
Marianne Bryant
Caity loves to eat sweets. There is no way of getting around that fact. She just does. She has now discovered that if she can bake cookies, it opens up a whole new world of eating that involves the spatula, and the mixing bowl. Caity's Dad . . .
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Caity Meets Her Pony Tail Tie
Marianne Bryant
I have always had to fix Caity's hair, no matter what. Caity has very curly hair and it is difficult to manage. When she was younger, I thought we were so fortunate that she was a girl because I didn't have to deal with the barbershop. I knew too many parents of ASD boys trying to deal with their child's sensory issues and their haircuts. Caity had long beautiful hair . . .
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Caity Meets a High School Visual
Marianne Bryant
It is a new semester and Caity has a ton on her plate. She has Honors Biology, Honors English, Avid and Journalism all in block scheduling. She goes to Big Brother & Big Sister where she visits with a little seven year old boy once a week. Also, she is covering and writing stories for the school newspaper on sporting events at her school. One day last week she was . . .
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Caity Meets the Old Appaloosa
Marianne Bryant
Caity was in the sixth grade and came home from school with a birthday party invitation. This party was a bit unusual because it was going to be given at a local ranch where everyone would be riding horses around a fenced in area. The children who were not experienced riders would be led around by one of the trainers and the ranch had experience in working with children with disabilities. It all seemed rather safe to me, but I really need to learn to listen to that little inner voice that tells me to . . .
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Caity Meets Her Countdown Visual
Marianne Bryant
I'm sure you will all know what I am talking about when I re-tell this next story. Your child finally gets invited to a birthday party and then you begin to get nervous. There is this little tiny part of you that almost wishes it hadn't happened because of all the anxiety that you, the mom, will go through. I used to always worry about how Caity would . . .
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Caity has Spring Break Without Mom
Marianne Bryant
In my wildest dreams, I would never have thought ten years ago that it would be possible for Caity and me to be separated. Who was going to brush her hair, help her brush her teeth, made sure she wore pajamas to bed, or kept her from eating everyone's deodorant? Most importantly, who would deal with . . .
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Caity meets Christmas
Marianne Bryant
I know you have heard of the saying "Christmas in July". Well, how about a Christmas story in June? I don't know what made me think of this story, but I like to write about those spontaneous thoughts that just pop into my head. Every parent gets excited at Christmas time when they have little ones who believe in Santa. It's fun to have their child's photo taken with Santa, to see the excitement in their eyes when they are giving Santa their wish list. It is even much more fun to decorate the tree, wrap the presents and hang the stockings while envisioning Christmas morning and their squeals of delight as they find what Santa left for them. . . .
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Caity meets the Holy Water Font
Marianne Bryant
Caity and I had been going to church together for years. Her Dad isn't a churchgoer and her older brother and sister are rather "sporadic" in their church attendance to say the least. Older sister, who is of another faith, is very involved with her family in her church. I had always felt that there was a place for Caity in a church somewhere and that she would be understood. The problem was her interpretation . . .
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Caitys Science Fair Experience
Marianne Bryant
Caity had to do a science project for school, so we put her board together. We began asking her questions about the project, she was getting mixed up on a few things. I highlighted the areas on her board in yellow for her to use as references in case she got nervous and forgot. I then told her . . .
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Caity meets "Mitt"
Marianne Bryant
Now, I have written about people that have made an impression in Caity's life: people that she has met in her journey to adulthood, that are either no longer with us, or were in her life for a brief time. There is one person, however; that has been there from day one. She is the person that rode in the back seat with Caity when she was three days old, and Caity's screaming was so bad, I actually was afraid she was going to explode. Mitt is also the very first person to have mentioned . . .
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Caity's Mom Meets Pain
Marianne Bryant
Just when life is plugging along at a good pace and you think, just maybe, life is good. Wham! Something happens to burst your bubble. It's that realization that your child is the one that is not included. You feel this stabbing pain of reality in your heart. Image 1It's one of those pains that just sits there. It's heavy, and it adds a good five pounds to the scale at weigh-in time. This pain is a dull ache that is capable of getting a whole lot worse. It can consume you allow it to happen. We have lived in the same neighborhood for 21 years. We were one of the first families to build in this neighborhood. We were very happy that the land stayed undeveloped for many years. It was my safe haven. When life in the real world got to be too much, especially with Autism, I had my escape: my own backyard. Caity was always happy . . .
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Caity's mom says "If I only knew then what I know now"
Marianne Bryant
Did you ever have one of those "a-ha" moments? I did, only it was about five years too late. If I had known then what I know now, I would have known Caity had Autism as early as one month of age. I actually would have known earlier, when she was about three days old; but that is probably another story. Caity was born on a sunny day in May. Her first month, at the time, seemed uneventful . . .
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Why We Use Visuals
Marianne Bryant
Many people think language will never develop in Autistic children if visuals and visual strategies are used. They feel the children will regress if they have any language skills to begin with. I, too, was one of those skeptics. My initial reaction was to put little faith in using visuals with my daughter. At that time, I was so desperate for her to develop language. I knew there was nothing else involved with trying this strategy that could hurt her, so I decided to try. I was so tired of the tantrums that . . .
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Caity finds her Own Way, without Mom
Marianne Bryant
As most of you parents know, there are many children that have Autism that have unbelievable skills. They may even be savants. If your child does have an extraordinary ability, it does help make that diagnosis just a teensy tiny bit easier to accept. If they are truly gifted as an artist or a musician, you can see a future for them that they can earn an income at. They will also be doing something they enjoy. Those children are a very small minority . . .
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